The P.G.N Assassin Squadron: Petey the Slick

A group of mean looking feathered rodents, pigeons, as they are properly referred to, gathered around a stale piece of pizza crust, which laid on the gravel, as the biggest in the group pecked away at the stale piece of pizza crust. The leader, the biggest pigeon in the group, was the meanest looking pigeon of them all, and had four missing toes on his left foot and an eye patch over one of his itty-bitty eyes. The passers-by walked by in awe. They had never seen such a pigeon in their lives, and the sight of such a creature arose curiosity in them. They were unaware that they were staring at a great war hero pigeon.

The pigeon which had piqued their curiosity went by the name of “Petey the Slick”. He had served in a highly esteemed pigeon squadron, back in his prime, before the missing toes and eye patch. He had served as head of a special unit developed by a US intelligence group in conjunction with the US Air Force, for the sake of expediency, and had helped bring about the defeat of the Nazis in Germany during WW2. The unit was officially named the “P.G.N. Assassin Squadron.”

Petey the Slick never cooed about war stories with the others, he was reluctant, and suffered from mild PPTSD (Pigeon Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), so almost no one knew that he had been in the same bunker as Hitler the day he ended his life. He witnessed Hitler’s desperate last moments as the opposing forces approached. In fact, had it not been for Petey the Slick, Hitler would not have been found. He had earned his stripes, but like many US war veterans now lived a destitute life in the streets, taking advantage of whatever morsel of food he could find.

The other pigeons had only heard stories of Petey the Slick’s role in WW2, which had been relayed to them by others whom Petey was more close to. They held him in high regards, and none of them dared to intrude on his feasting. He was a goddamn war hero! So, they just gathered around, walking to and fro, avoiding eye contact with Petey–for fear he might snap, as he was none to do–and watched the piece of bread decrease in portion with each peck.




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